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Stop Yelling, Mum!

August 28th, 2017
Stop Yelling, Mum!

image from pinterest

I had a virus for three days. On day four, I was feeling better, but possessed only a squeaky-whisper voice.

"How will I get through this day?" I wondered.

Normal days were filled with talking to my children.
I often raised my voice when I needed to get my point across.

That day I had to whisper. I used my voice sparingly.

It worked a lot better than yelling.

What makes good parents yell at their kids, anyway?
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As parents, we have our "triggers" – those things that upset us.

Just watch a parent and child at the park and you will see a common trigger:

1. She said "it’s time to go" and the child didn’t listen.
2. She threatened consequences, but didn’t follow through.
3. She’s understandably frustrated.
4. She starts yelling, hoping her child will finally comply.
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There are countless things that can drive parents to a boiling point.

Author / Mom Julie Barnhill says, ""You can wake up in a good mood, go downstairs, see the messy kitchen and you're annoyed ― without anyone doing anything!"

When triggers attack, try one of these strategies to keep your cool:

1. Plan ahead of time for what you want to do differently next time you feel like raising your voice. Do the opposite – and whisper. This builds a habit of controlling your voice volume.

3. Give weight to your words -- the first time. If you warn that you will take your child
home if they keep misbehaving, then keep your promise.

2. Communicate close to your child. Look at his or her eyes. This can help you focus on the important message, instead of the emotions raging internally.

3. If you are tempted to yell, remove yourself from the room for a few moments until you feel calmer.

4. Save yelling for danger situations. "Don’t touch that stove!"

"I am too mad right now to talk about this. I am going to take a time-out and calm down." -- Laura Markham, author.
Whether at home or out and about, what has worked well for you?

Lisa x

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